Today's Money Quote

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Quotes (36)

Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.
Ambrose Bierce Filed in Humor

Don't let your mouth write no check that your tail can't cash.
Bo Diddley Filed in Humor

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.
Bob Hope Filed in Humor

Costs are like fingernails, they always have to be cut.
Carlos Sicupira Filed in Humor

If plan A fails, remember there are 25 more letters.
Chris Guillebeau Filed in Humor

I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons.
Douglas Adams Filed in Humor

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
Earl Wilson Filed in Humor

This would be a much better world if more married couples were as deeply in love as they are in debt.
Earl Wilson Filed in Humor

Today, there are three kinds of people: the have's, the have-not's, and the have-not-paid-for-what-they-have's.
Earl Wilson Filed in Humor

Money is the best deodorant.
Elizabeth Taylor Filed in Humor

Money is the best deodorant.
Elizabeth Taylor Filed in Humor

Money, if it does not bring you happiness, will at least help you be miserable in comfort.
Helen Gurley Brown Filed in Humor

I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock.
Henny Youngman Filed in Humor

Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.
Jackie Mason Filed in Humor

Don't look for the needle in the haystack. Just buy the haystack!
John Bogle Filed in Humor

If I owe you a pound, I have a problem; but if I owe you a million, the problem is yours.
John Maynard Keynes Filed in Humor

Being rich means you get to worry about everything except money.
Johnny Cash Filed in Humor

My formula for success is rise early, work late and strike oil.
JP Getty Filed in Humor

The safest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it in your pocket.
Kin Hubbard Filed in Humor

I made my money the old-fashioned way. I was very nice to a wealthy relative right before he died.
Malcolm Forbes Filed in Humor


Today's Money Quote
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